Photo taken on the Florida Keys, April 2011 by me.
Recently, you may have noticed that I’ve been under a lot of stress. This is something I’ve made reference to in several blog posts and about a million tweets. I don't want to be a Moaning Myrtle or a Whining Winona but it is so difficult to feel all the pressure and stress bubbling up inside and to not let it translate into text. Part of me wants to stick with the mould set out by most bloggers to show my face, my outfit and my instagram... without really showing the girl I am underneath that. But I can't deny that I am an absolute consistent ball of stress and I do need to address that sharpish.
Yesterday at the Spa, the beauty therapist told me that I’m way too tense and that I need to take more time to my self and chill out. On the after care sheet, the word RELAX was underlined three times. Yeah.
I'm not too sure why I’ve had so much on my plate recently, I balance a lot. I work full time, am doing my degree and try and make time for friends and family. I feel like I’m trying to be super women but those teeny knickers weren’t designed for me and there is too much going on to try and cram in. So I do need to chill the fuck out.
Last night I was trying to formulate a plan of attack to relax but I ended up frustrating myself by trying to make a PLAN out of relaxation. Surely the whole point of relaxing is that you sit there... relaxing. There shouldn't be an agenda for something that should come so easily. To me it clearly doesn't. I am just a girl with a mission and that mission is to do what ever I need to do to move onto the next mission. Like the worlds most boring video game: Continuously completing tasks and getting nowhere and achieving nothing.
It's got to the point where I don't sleep at all, because my mind is so awake all the time. I always have something to do and a list of things that I haven't done to berate myself over. Last week I literally had about 16 hours sleep.. IN SEVEN DAYS. The bags under my eyes were disgusting purple smudges and everything just hurt.
So I’m going to continue trying to relax and de-stress and not take the weight of the world on my shoulders. This afternoon I read a book for a whole hour, I didn't try and read and reorganise my life. I just read and it was glorious.
Is it possible to chill out without completing a task? Personally the only task I do to relax is read. Everything else I tend to over focus on. If you have wisdom in the art of R&R whilst remaining on top of your life, then please do help a girl out- I'm still pretty crap at it.
What do you do to relax? What would you sacrifice from your routine in order to get precious 'you' time?
Are posts like this even interesting, or did you read it like.. 'eugh, stop whining'?